Maybe

Maybe if I hadn't wasted three years of my life chasing what I thought was your shadow,

I'd measure up to your golden stature.

Maybe you're everything I've ever wanted

Maybe we could have made it – you make me think these things,

You force me.

I'd love to force you... I have, and haven't taken the time to think of everything that makes you beautiful.

I'd kill to feel your hand in mine. And fight to try to not feel inexcusably small next to you.

I had to see it twice, it's like the first time I didn't get it but the second time it hit me hard.

You did, you made me see you.

Something so amazingly beautiful that with envy in my eyes, my heart did cry.

Stuck in this crappy little boat, I wish I were you and want to love you at the same time.

I wish I had the same things you did, I wish I could do the same things you do.

No one will ever do but you, no one has and no one ever will.

The finality of my love for you hangs like death in stale air.

I want to do something, anything, to prove to you that one day I could stand next to you, as your other half.

I love you, is that enough? I need you, is that not abundantly clear?

My life has been washed, castrated, and sanitized. I'm what you would call a “good catch” with a side of failure.

The corpse that is my life rings clear like wedding bells in the Fall.

And I, undead, look up to you and wonder how I never knew you were oh so, divine.

Lady Sings the Blues

An old tune plays

with natural familiarity,

A thick voice heard

above the lazy music.

A few regulars

sit and listen.

While the sound of chatty

laughter infiltrates a memory.

"I'm a fool to want you, to

want a love that can't be true."

She sings with a crooked

twinkle in her eye,

Too numb to feel

the pain which once inspired her.

Straddling the line

between death and eternity,

Tears are rolling down

her face,

Her voice

shakes, her eyes

roll back.

Faint whispers

are only heard now.

The crowd unwillingly

immersed in her glory.

Cheap Date.

Are you the wolf,

Luring me into a secluded room?

Of smoke and mirrors strategically placed?

In a crafty effort to end the game

Of cat and mouse we so brazenly played?

Well honey,

I am many things. But I'm certainly not inane.

I will hear nothing of your fickle plans,

No wedding bells or daft romance.

"Something for nothing," you demand.

Yet you expect me to so willingly succumb,

A whore for words, reluctantly consumed

Like fumes from the last cigarette of the pack.

Languidly savored till the final drag

Then exhaled into the world again?

Your argument is mad.

And yet you're thoroughly convinced!

Intoxicated by a drug, yet too cheap to pay for it.

Spare me your dreams, I have my own.

I would much rather be left alone

Than be jaded by a prick.

Miss Anthrope

It's no secret, I've been

Utterly deceived.

Not by a man, but by the

Heathen inside me.

Now anger slowly

Seeps, out through the

Debris.

And yet I still

Cry out,

"Will no one set

me free?"

Will I wake up? Or is this

My destiny?

Forever building

castles, that are

Tumbled by the sea?

I'll start again

a thousand times,

Until I am

Redeemed.

Before I love

Another, the way

You ravaged me.